Business:busy

Yep. I'm working full time and interviewing for Zumba related stuff right now, and because of this I am pretty boring. I'm sorry! This coming year should be good... I hope! This is what I look like on the average day. I feel both under and over dressed.

Red Carpet Manicure Gel Polish: A Review.

I have posted before about my nail woes — how they break, peel, and just annoy me to bits. I work at a convenience store, and I don't think that helps the matter. My hands are constantly in bleach water, and because I work with the public I use a ton of alcohol-based hand sanitizer. Both of these dry my hands, and nails, out. No moisturizer has been able to fix this, and I don't believe that I am going to be able to find one that will. 

I have looked at this kit so many times, and I couldn't bring myself to buy it. It was $59.99 at my local Fred Meyer, and it seemed so expensive. I love having nice nails, but I haven't seen any reviews for diy gel nail polish and I tend to be rather inept when it comes to this sort of thing. There was a $10 off sale, and I decided to risk it. 

First off,  I truly recommend buying the kit, and not buying it piece by piece. I did the math, and I saved roughly $20. Not an enormous savings, but every bit counts. 

Secondly, it works wonders. Truly. I did this, while miserably sore (Zumba instructor training — there is a post coming!) and watching television late at night. It came out beautifully. It basically involves applying the base coat, putting it under the light, and then doing the same for each coat of polish thereafter. There is a finishing rub you use after to remove any tackiness. Just follow the instructions to the letter, and it will look incredible. 

I waited about a week to show you my nails, just because I wanted to give you a thorough review. Usually my nails are all chipped after about a day of work. I have had this on for two shifts and a week of pet-sitting and dishes. Lots of work! 

It is perfect! The tips are all covered, the polish is intact, and for some reason, the color doesn't look even in this photo. My nails look better in real life! 

The one caveat to this polish is that it lasts for two weeks, and the removal process is slightly more involved than normal polish (those who have had a gelish manicure are familiar with this.) You have to soak it off with a cotton ball and acetone for about ten minutes, to break down the polish. It really doesn't take to long. 

Ultimately, it was worth the money for me. It was an expensive initial investment, and the polishes are about $10 a piece, but I don't have to keep re-polishing my nails. Right now I'm working one full time job, one part time job, and going to school. I don't have a lot of spare time to keep re-polishing my nails, and I would rather be able to go out with my friends during the spare time I have. This polish allows me to look professional while only painting my nails twice a week. Awesome, no? 

ETA: I NO LONGER RECOMMEND THIS PRODUCT. It was terrible to remove after the first time, and no longer stuck afterwards. I returned the kit, and got most of my money back. Not happy.

Scent

Do you ever get a whiff of something, and it just takes you places? Like, the smell of fresh cut grass takes me back to my grandmum's house when I was about 8, playing in the yard in the crazy daisy (a weird sprinkler thing) 

I used up this shower gel about two months ago, and I still haven't had the heart to throw the bottle away. The funny thing is that, when I got it, I wasn't overwhelmed with the scent. Someone had given it to my mum, and she didn't like it, and she passed it off to me. It was over the summer, when I was working a town away from B and miserable. 

One night, after a wretched day at work, we talked. We talked just about every night, but this night was different. He could tell I was upset, stressed out, and just done. 

He came and picked me up. I know that doesn't sound like much, but he lived an hour away from where I was, and he had just gotten off of a 9 hour shift at work. It was midnight, but he was coming to take me home. 

I threw some random stuff into a bag, and this shower gel was part of it. I ended up leaving it at our apartment, and I would use it on the nights he would take me home (it happened about twice a month after that.)

This shower gel reminds me of the relaxed feeling of crawling into our bed after a hot shower. It reminds me of the dinners we had sitting on the floor, because we still hadn't had a chance to furnish the place. It reminds me of standing outside, in front of my grandmum's, waiting for him to arrive. 

It reminds me of how good it is to be loved. 

Thoughts, and an unfortunate picture.

I'm presently stuck in the most boring oceanography lecture in the universe. I typically love this class, but since this is the last week of term and finals are next week, people are asking stupid questions. This bores that crap out of me, and makes me want to leave. I would leave the class, but we get points for staying for the full class. I like getting A's. 

Anyway, I was talking to a friend (S) a few days ago, and the conversation has stuck in my head. We were discussing our everyday makeup/clothing, and which was more important as far as other people's perceptions go. To me, if I see someone in a somewhat boring outfit but with their hair and makeup done, I think it is intentional. I know that when I get stressed out, I wear a cute sweatshirt and leggings with heels and light makeup. I still look semi-polished, but not as "done" as I would normally like. (See above look. Yay finals and nasty landlords!)  

I know that I don't get as many doors opened for me when I wear flats and don't wear makeup. I don't get too offended by it, because I haven't put any effort in. S thinks that is wrong, that people should be perceived the same way all the time because they are the same person whether or not they put effort in. I disagree with this. I know that I get up a bit earlier to do my hair and makeup, and I consider it a part of putting my best foot forward. I don't expect to show up in sweats and be treated as though I'm wearing a gown. 

Happy Thanksgiving!

I hope everyone is having an amazing holiday! We went for lattes and just started preparations for dinner. I'm so excited because everyone is coming. Sadfaced though, because B isn't going to be here until seven or so tonight; another nine hours.

I'm off to drown my sorrows in mashed potatoes :)

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Frumpy.

I hate having short nails. I feel like I look unpolished, and almost immature, as odd as it sounds. I don't feel that way when I see other people with short nails, but the moment my nails start breaking, I get annoyed. My fingers seem fatter and I feel less elegant.

I admit, when my nail broke yesterday, I went out and bought glue on fakes, which were terrible and popped off in less than a day (full review coming when I get my computer back.) I am going to dinner with my boyfriend and his extended family tomorrow, and I wanted to look perfect. However, I painted my natural nails today, and I'm okay with them. I mean, this is who I am. There are plenty of thing to judge me on, and my nails should be the least of my worries. I'm excited to meet them, and am going to try to take it easy on myself. I get so carried away in my pursuit of perfection sometimes, and I need to remember that it is okay, and no one else is going to care how my nails look.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Something New.

This week I have done two things: Develop a massively unfortunately blemish on my chin, and get glasses.  

Everyone in my family has glasses, and I knew that I was eventually going to have to get them myself. Last week I was sitting in class and I realized that I couldn't read the stuff on the PowerPoint. I got out to my car and called my mum's eye doctor, setting up an eye appointment that I went to yesterday.

Apparently, I'm near sighted. And I have to wear these all the time. I go between being okay with it to being a tad frustrated. I lose my phone/purse/brain all the time, and I'm afraid that these are going to be just one more thing.

I do so love how clear everything is now though! 

I'm off to work, and am going straight from there to my grandmum's, because tomorrow is a holiday and I don't have classes. YAY!

I Are Annoyed.

For some reason I am having incredible difficulties in getting my photos from my 4S to my Macbook. It is making me Grrrrfaced, which is never a good thing. So, in lieu of my awesome post on Laura Mercier eyeliner, you get ancient photobooth images of me. They are completely loltastic, so I figured they would be worthwhile.

This first image is from about a year ago:

This one is from two years ago:

I always seem so intense in my photos. Seriously, who do I think I am?

Why I'm Returning My Kindle Keyboard 3G With Ads.

I really wanted to love it. I had looked forward to receiving it, and it was one of my big purchases of the fall. I thought that it would be fantastic, and I kept holding on to it, expecting it to be better. Unfortunately, it doesn't do anything better than my iPad or iPhone could do, and the fact that their library  is going to be so limited definitely plays into my decision. I read a lot, and I read very, very fast. I can get through a 250 page cheap fiction novel in less than an hour, and I love it. I had previously bought books through the Kindle app on my Droid, and read them there. I had no problem, but I thought that the E-Ink would be easier on my eyes. Truthfully, there is no real or noticeable difference, at least not for me. I do like the weight difference, and the ease of clicking through the pages. 

The fact that the library is only twelve books a year kills my enthusiasm. I had hoped that I would be able to purchase Amazon Prime, and read unlimited books, albeit one at a time. Twelve books a year is an insanely small amount of books. Especially for a dedicated E-Reader. Also, the Kindle takes forever to wake up from sleep mode. I mean, I flick the button, and nearly a minute later, it responds. Not remotely okay. I understand that they want me to see the ads, but I don't need to see the same Twilight movie ad for a minute to understand what they are trying to sell. 

Overall, this was a major disappointment, and not worth $149. If it goes on sale for under $90 on Black Friday, I might consider repurchasing it, but I would be hard-pressed to pay this price.

Thursday Three .1

This Wallet by Ted Baker

These Cases by MUJI

A weekend here 

I'm going to be spending the night there with B soon! I'm so insanely excited, practically living for it. 

Rite Aid Pharmacy is awesome.

I know this is random, but I have to post about the awesomeness that is my local Rite Aid. See, I have been on Yaz for about five years now, to keep my skin clear. I get horrific cystic acne, and this is one of the few things that keeps it to a minimum. I get maybe six breakouts a year, as opposed to 10-15+ all the time. It was that bad.

I usually had my prescription filled at Costco pharmacy, and it was always a hassle. I was never sure why, because my doctor has made this prescription pretty much open-ended, I have no other health issues, and my insurance coverage hasn't changed. I pick it up at the same place, around the same time, every four weeks. This isn't something I skip, something I change, something I miss. The acne breakouts are incredibly painful and embarrassing, and I will break out if I miss pills. Yet, I would call three days in advance to have it filled, and they would never have it ready when I arrived. I just thought it was normal.

I recently moved house, and I decided to switch over to a pharmacy closer to my apartment. I called Rite Aid around 4pm today, and I asked if they could have the prescription transferred over. They said yes, and that they would call me when it was ready.

I got a call around 7pm today, and I missed it because I was driving. I got to the Rite Aid around 8, thinking they had probably run into problems and needed more information for me.

They had it ready for me. I was in the store for less than two minutes. I kid you not, it was that easy. I will get all of my prescription filled there from here on in, because I didn't have to mess around. I am busy, and this was just amazing.

Fuck yeah, Rite Aid. You are the win.


*Just to make things clear, I am in no way affiliated with Rite Aid. Not at all. They don't have any idea as to my existence, this blog, or the fact that I think they rock. I received no compensation for any of this.

The iPhone 4S. Finally.

I know I swore up and down that I would have this post up sooner, but I ended up working 40 hours this week along with horrible, horrible midterms, and when I got home I just wanted to spend time with B and relax. 

I was lucky enough to get my hands on a white 32gb iPhone 4S about two weeks ago. My old Droid X was shutting itself off and on whenever I received a call, and it was driving me insane. I would miss calls, get voicemail, and it wouldn't alert me to any of it. I was in Salem one night, and my phone got super hot and reset itself, and I knew I was done. 

I went to the Verizon store, and was horrifically thrilled to find that they had one, and ONLY one left. I bought it right then and there, and we have not been apart yet. 

I'm going to compare it to the Droids I had before, the DX and a Moto Droid (the first one.)

The 4S is thinner than both of them, and I feel like the body is sturdier/more expensive feeling. I really like that, but it is a bit heavy. It is also insanely fragile, so I have a thick case on it. It creates bulk, so the overall size of the phone is kind of moot. 

I love that it has a hard mute button. I just move the switch, and it mutes my phone. SO convenient. 

The screen is smaller, and I admit, it is a bit awkward. I wish that it was more screen, less body. However, the screen is more beautiful and crisp than either of my old phones. 

The OS/processor/overall pep: Omigod, this thing is perfect. Yeah. I had rooted my old phones, done everything I could, and it was never this smooth. This is incredibly fast, incredibly smooth, and it makes sense. You know what I mean? It took me zero time to understand this phone, because it is instinctual. 

The cameras: They are awesome. The forward facing camera is meh, but good enough for Facetime or checking my lipstick. The actual camera is fantastically awesome. I had an 8mp camera on the DX, and the images were never this clear.

The Apps: I know there is some drama about how controlling Apple is as far as their App Store, but it is so worth it. The same apps that I had on my Droids are so much better on this phone, I don't even know how to describe it. It is almost like the apps on the Droid were in beta, and the iPhone app is the finished product. It is truly that much better. 

Siri: Siri is awesome. I love being able to get into my car, hit a button, ask for directions and go. I have a crappy old car, and will have this crappy old car for a while. This gives me features that I wouldn't have without spending 40k on a car. However, I *only* use Siri in the car, so I don't know that it is that useful for people who don't drive/need hands free service often. 

iCloud: I have an iPad, a Macbook, and now I have an iPhone. I love that I can sync all of them. However, I haven't used this feature much. Is it a necessity? Not for me. This, however, wasn't a major sales point for me. Admittedly, it was a sort of afterthought.

Ultimately, I love my new phone. I needed a new phone, and I'm glad that I went with an iPhone.

Midterms/Goals for the November (Early!)

I have fallen off the face of the planet/been taking midterms. I want to die. Anyway, this is what has happened since my last post:

• I bought an iPhone 4S. I have the review written (I just need to take photos.) Overall, it is so awesome. 
• My boyfriend had his wisdom teeth removed, and I have been trying to make him more comfortable, with differing degrees of success. I feel so bad for him.
• I have been working my butt off at my new job, and it has gone pretty well. I have no real social life (it is Saturday, and I will be leaving for work in about an hour, and I won't get home until 11:30 tonight... if I'm lucky. If not, it will be closer to midnight. I work the same hours tomorrow) but I'm able to get by. 
• I signed up for Zumba training! I'm going to be an instructor! I'm so excited. 

I have also set up some goals for myself:

• No fast food. I will bring a WW dinner with me to work, and go straight home afterwards. I don't need to be wasting money on junk.
• I will work out 4x a week, no matter how busy I am. I need to be fit for Zumba!
• I will track my points every day. I have paid for the membership, and I have the app on my phone. To not track is just simple laziness. 
• I will wear blush! I don't usually wear it, but I get so many compliments when I do. 
• I will wear makeup every time I go out. It doesn't have to be a lot, but the truth is this: It takes me less than ten minutes to apply my makeup, and people respect me more when I wear it. 
• I will spend 15 minutes per day trying to clean the house! It has become a bit cluttered recently, mainly because B and I are so busy. 

Wint O Green Lifesavers Are Really, Really Great.

As I have whined about before, I have a wicked, miserable, horrible cold. 

I also have a new job. That I have to show up to. 

Therefore, I'm not able to take any awesome-but-sleep-inducing cold medicines. 

This is where Lifesavers come in. 

I love them.

Here's why:

They soothe my throat

Are low in calories

Smell good to those around me, unlike cough drops

I like them when I'm over my cold, also unlike cough drops

Overall, Wint O Green Lifesavers are awesome.

No, I'm not affiliated with Lifesavers. 

Yes, I'm finally off work and at home, and have taken a fair bit of Nyquil. My coherency level is probably less than zero. 

Mrow. (This should have posted on Friday.)

My boyfriend got a cold and decided to share the wealth, plus I started my new job and have been crazy busy. 

This week:

I started my new job, which is wonderful but exhausting. I work Thursday, Saturday and Sunday 3pm to 11:30pm. I'm going to be DEAD tonight.

I decided to work out hardcore, and only lost a pound with WW. And I'm still up 2lbs from my starting weight. Grrrr. 

I bought a Kindle! I have wanted one for a long, long time, but I made myself wait until I had another steady job. I sold some of my textbooks back to Amazon, and used the gift cards to treat myself. 

My parents got a new car, and I'm attempting to learn how to drive a standard car. It is not going as well as I had hoped. My personal vehicle is super heavy, and their car is light. I'm too used to flooring it as soon as the light turns green. 

This job is surprisingly easy, but I still have work dread. I'm not sure why, because the job itself isn't too terrible, but I just... dread it. It is about 1pm here, and my shift starts at 3. I have about an hour and a half before I have to leave. Yet, for some reason, I'm all like "I don't want to go to work." But If I were to call in today, I wouldn't have anything better to do. I would just sit at home and read. 

I have become completely addicted to Greek yogurt parfaits. I buy nonfat Greek Yogurt, frozen strawberries and peaches, and put it in a reusable container. I have been taking it to work for lunch, and it is pretty delicious. 

Should I?

Right now my grandmum, mum, and younger siblings are all getting ready to visit my Uncle in Iowa. They are going to drive there, and it will be a two week trip.

I want to go.

I would have to drop my classes for this term, and I would probably have to quit my job, but there is this part of me that just wants to go. Like Steve Jobs said, when you have been unhappy for too many days in a row, it is time to change things. I know that this trip isn't the magical key to happiness, but it would be a once in a lifetime experience. I have never been so irresponsible in my life, but I just don't know what is keeping me here.

I mean, I'm able to drop my classes without penalty until the thirteenth, and I think that I would be able to find another job. I just... I want to go.

I have been working or going to school or both since I was fifteen. I'm a year ahead in school. What would the crime be in taking the term off and just enjoying myself? I would start a major hunt for another job as soon as I got back, and it would be perfect.


Why yes, I am an escapist. I'm in class right now, have work in two hours (directly after) and then another three hour class after working four hours.

I'm exhausted.

My Philosophy Instructor....

Is chatty and likes to keep his students out until 11pm on a school/work night. I know I'm worthless as far as posting goes! I'm so, so sorry.

Evil Shades!!!!!

I got the stuff I ordered from Evil Shades today! This is not a proper review, just an excited "YAYYYYYY!" post. I'm going to take good photos and post all about it tomorrow. It is too dark here for me to get a decent photo now. I'm wearing Lost Kiss on my lips in this photo though :)

Right now, I'm loving:

Dr. Pepper TEN

Dark eyeliner and sparkly shadow

Green Tea

Dangly Earrings

Right now, I'm wanting:

A weekend away

Burberry Lipsticks (All of them, or at least all of the nudes/reds)

A soft, buttery leather satchel to carry my laptop/textbooks

Amazon to get the books I sold back so I can finally order a Kindle

Right now, I'm loathing:

The fact that my physics instructor has to teach. He is a nice enough guy, but incapable of teaching. Condescending with no sense of humor. Example: He asked us to make a graph in Excel today. I asked him what sort of graph (line, bar, etc.) He responded by telling me that I should understand Microsoft Office products because they are essential in business. It isn't that I don't understand how to use it. I just don't know what he wants.

The weirdness of starting a new job. 

Being lonely. 

Not being able to exercise. I've literally been too busy this week. Every 20 minute segment of my day has been planned out, and I'm ready to relax! 

Steve Jobs.

His was an incredible mind. RIP.

Things I'm Using in October.

Last month was pretty terrible for me. I had no free time whatsoever towards the end, and with moving/finishing work/basic life stuff I had little to no time to blog or even wear makeup. I seriously think that I work Virgin and Sin from the Naked palette with mascara and lip balm every day.

This month is a lot more open for me, and now I can get back in to the groove of beauty/fashion. Yay!

I'm currently using:

Colgate Optic White Toothpaste (yes, another whitening product.)
Olay 7 Total Effects Body Wash
Maybelline Baby Lips

Goals:

I'm trying to wear eyeliner daily to improve my skills. I am meh when it comes to applying eyeliner, but I love the look.

I'm  going to work out 20 out of 31 days this month. I have a bit of a cubicle belly/butt now, and I'm not overwhelmingly impressed.

I am going to get a 4.0 this term. I'm taking harder classes this term, and not only am I going to get a 4 point, I'm also going to test higher than college algebra. I'm going to take the placement test on November first, and need to study my butt off. Wish me luck!

McDonald's for Dinner.

Which, as a vegetarian, amounts to french fries and a Mcflurry. 

My parent's have a Bible study tonight, and so I come into town with them and drive around while they do their thing. It sounds horrifically boring, but I love to drive. It makes me happy. 

We go to the McD near the capitol in Salem, and it is always sad to me to see all these incredibly well dressed men sitting alone here with the food. I know they are busy, but the loneliness of it bothers me. Weird, no? I guess that it strikes me because these men all seem powerful when they are at work, but they just seem small and alone here, sitting in the corner with their cheeseburger and hot fudge sundae. 

Meh. Maybe it is just me. 

I'm completely dead tonight. I'm a mentor for one of the philosophy classes, and a part of that responsibility is to proofread the papers for the students that ask. Someone just emailed me their paper. Want to know when it is due? Tomorrow. At 8. I also have a bunch of my own homework that is due tomorrow. Essentially, I have about five of my own papers to write (not double spaced) and proofread and 20+ of someone else's. Yay! 

Not completely upset though. I love proofreading. Seriously. I would love to spend the rest of my time at university working as a TA. 

Off to edit! 

It's lotion season!!!!!

For some reason, I always start moisturizing hardcore right around this time of year. I don't know if it is out of fear of the oncoming dryness, or if I am just less annoyed by the sticky after-lotion feeling. Anyway, I stole one of my mum's Bath & Body Works body butters and have been using it for a few days. I usually use Body Shop butters, and they are still my favorite.

The B&BW butter that I tried is the White Cherry Blossom scent, and as far as scent goes, it is perfect. A light scent that lingers, but not remotely overwhelming. This butter is incredibly thick, but almost harder than the Body Shop butters. I don't know how to describe it, but it is almost waxy. I don't feel like it sinks in to my skin so much as it goes over it. I apply it after my nighttime shower to seal in moisture, and I haven't really noticed much of a difference in the two weeks that I've been using it. I have gone through most of the jar though, which is fairly typical for body butters, though I usually don't go through them that fast. Overall, I'm meh with these and would probably only repurchase on an epic sale. 2.5/5

Crappy midnight pic on my Macbook. Yay me! 

I have a new job!!!!!!!!

Yes. I am wearing a shirt. And sweatpants. And I may have had a couple of celebratory glasses of wine. However, I deserved it. It has been a long day, and none of the outlets in the bedroom work. And the washer is broken. 

Enough of my whining! 

I have a new job! It is absolutely perfect for me. I will be working Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights. I think I mentioned before that I don't need a full time job, just something that will allow me to put gas in my car and save a tiny bit for the future. This job will allow me to do that and still have a tiny bit of a social life. My old job ended last Thursday, and it took less than a week for me to realize that I was going to go insane without something to do and a steady income. 

I will probably look for an additional part time job Sunday through Thursday, but this definitely takes away that panic of not knowing if I'm going to be okay financially and the agonizing boredom that goes with. 

I admit, I've fallen in love.

I didn't want to. I mean, it smells so terrible, and for the price... I have expectations. I never planned to finish the .5 ounce jar that I bought, and I never expected to spend $60 for the large 4 ounce jar. But I did.

I have always had such a difficult time with moisturizers. I like to be able to use the same moisturizer day and night most of the year, but I tend to have trouble finding one that is both moisturizing and non-greasy. This has a bizarre texture, solid almost, and then it melts immediately into my skin. I like that it absorbs quickly, and the smell does dissipate eventually. I have found that my skin is pretty much perfect when I use this, which is odd for me to say. I have cystic acne, and during certain parts of my cycle/when I get stressed I usually get three or four massive breakouts. When I use this consistently, I either won't get any at all or I will get one tiny blemish that disappears promptly.

Overall, I have to say that this is pretty much amazing. I still wish it didn't smell the way it does, but the benefits of it completely outweigh the nasty smell.



On a completely different note, I finally have internet access! I nearly kissed the poor UPS guy when he brought me my router this afternoon. I have never seen anyone run down the stairs to my apartment so fast.... Anyway, my posting will be far more regular now! 

An Update.

I am officially moved in! It has been long and frustrating, and I still don't have internet in the apartment. It has been weird and stressful, but for the most part worthwhile. I'm still in the process of setting things up, but I'm still here. A few things: -- My now former employers managed to mess up my last paycheck, so I have to call tomorrow to nag for my last $164. I hate dealing with money, and it makes me tense. -- My mum has become incredibly supportive in a way I never would have expected. -- My boyfriend is an amazing, creative cook. -- I'm okay, and approaching happiness. While this may not be my glorious dream, I am trying to look at the best parts.

Wanted:

Someone to assist me in moving house, finishing off my last three days of a wretched job, and finding a fast car that is affordable and reliable. 

I will pay you back in peanut butter brownies.

That's all.

How long does it take?

Today I realized that I have had one of my cleansers for nearly a year now. It has about half an inch of product in the squeeze tube, and I'm hoping to finish it off within the week, but it was a bit of an awakening for me. I mean, I wash my face at least twice a day, but I realized that I buy cleansers at a rather alarming rate. I mean, a year to use up a cleanser?

I'm going to try to force myself to use up two cleansers before I allow myself to buy another one, because I tend to buy new ones far too frequently. I know I should probably make myself do that with my lipsticks as well, but I really love lipstick. And you can never have too many. 

Which leads me to my final point: I said I was going to post my week in lipstick. And I meant to. However, I'm in the process of moving and with the randomly cloudy weather in my area, I was completely incapable of getting a decent photo of any of the colors. So, at some point, you will be inundated with lipstick picks. Today is not that day. 

I'm odd lately.

You know those days? Where you aren't happy, aren't sad, but can't seem to get yourself out of a funk?

I've had two of them, yesterday and today. I'm not sure why, and my boyfriend and mum have both noticed. And I'm tired of it. I mean, I have a lot to be excited about, and yet I can't seem to bring myself out of it. I'm not depressed, and I'm not hurt, but I'm not happy. 

I have come to this conclusion: It is okay not to be happy. 

We try so hard to be happy. All the time. And we psych ourselves up to be with people. Earlier today I was talking to B, and I could tell that I was bringing him down. So I spent the last ten minutes of the call (we are currently long distance, to those who may not know) being upbeat and positive so that I didn't leave him empty. I went to dinner with my grandmum, and I spent the whole time laughing and chattering to keep from seeming low. 

And for what? What is so wrong with having a couple of days without happiness? Some days, things get to us. The things that people say on a regular basis, things we usually expect, can unexpectedly stab us. 

I'm looking for a car right now, and I'm looking at one specific vehicle that I'm really excited about. It is right on the outer edge of my budget, but I can afford it. It isn't the typical college car, but I would enjoy it to pieces. I was talking to my grandmum about it, and she got snipey about it, saying that I should just get a little car that is cheaper. She then asked what my plans for grad school are, and I said that I'm contemplating (insert school name here) if I can get a decent scholarship. She followed that with "You certainly have expensive tastes." 

She is always like that, and usually it doesn't bother me. I know that I have paid for everything since I was fifteen, and I have worked really hard to get what I want, with grades/etc. Today it nearly brought me to tears. 

So I'm working towards being happy again. But it isn't easy right now. 

(sorry for the massive personal post)

What I'm up to:

• I'm looking for a new car. I'm trying to decide if I will go for something cheap, that I'm mostly indifferent to but will leave me with tiny car payments, or something that is $3,000 more that I really love and would enjoy. Driving is a great joy of mine, so I'm really leaning towards the more expensive car. It fits into my budget, but it would make things a tiny bit tighter. However, if I can find a new job, I won't have to worry at all. Which leads to point number two:
• I am finishing up my current job and looking for a new one. I loved working for my present employer, and am still eligible for rehire, but the seasonal job is up and it would cut into my classes to train to stay on permanently. I'm really bummed, and looking for a little part time job that will have more public involvement in the future. 
• I'm packing up my stuff here, and prepping to move into my new apartment. I'm both crazy excited and nervous. 
• I'm getting ready for classes to start! I have a few volunteer things set up, the reading list for one of my classes started, and will be mentoring some of the first-year students from one of my favorite instructors. I can't wait.

Lean Cuisine Broccoli Cheddar Dip with Pita Bread: A Food Review

These have been advertised everywhere, and I was thinking that they would be terrible. I have had a few bad flavor experiences with frozen broccoli products before, and this was low-priced enough that I thought it was going to be all ends, with stretchy cheese and little flavor. I was also afraid that the pita would be crappy, since it was frozen and then microwaved. 

Oh My Fluffy Grey and white kittens, this is amazing. So amazing. It was warm, flavorful, and filling. Not filling enough to be a dinner on its own, but with a salad? Definitely. Or as a nice lunch, which is how I plan to have the second serving at work, since it doesn't involve any flatware. 

Yeah. I'm not a food blogger, but this was good enough to make me want to share it with everyone.

(To the people who are here just for the beauty stuff, I'm going back to that starting tomorrow. This was just something I felt oddly compelled to share. I'm not going to start posting food stuff all the time.) 

Maybelline Master Drama Eyeliner Review

I can sum this up in two words: The Shit. Seriously, this is the absolute best thing ever. I purchased Coal Commander, and I have worn it nonstop ever since. It is way better than my Urban Decay liners, MAC liners, and every other liner I have used. Smooth and creamy, easy to apply, but stays put throughout the day. I am not very good at applying eyeliner, but this eyeliner makes it easy. I completely and utterly adore it. 

My boyfriend AND platonic male coworker both noticed when I switched over to it: my boyfriend said that my eyes looked really pretty, and PMC said that I looked like a scene kid. (A style he adores, but cannot pull of, therefore I take it as a huge compliment. 

Things 2

We have dishes!!!!!!! (Yes, dishes with SEVEN exclamation points. I'm just that excited.)

I know I've mentioned it before, but not recently. Within the next few weeks I will be moving out on my own for the first time. I have lived on my own to an extent for the past few years for work, but I was living with family members and even though I was paying rent, it still isn't the same. 

I'm moving in with my closest friend, and we have been on the hunt for dishes. I'm super picky about my dishes, but am also a poor college student. You cannot imagine my incredibly joy when I found this set. I can't stop smiling. I'm just like... wow. 

I'm in the process of moving house/finishing off work/setting up for school and getting a new internet service, so my posting is going to be somewhat intermittent until this coming Monday. 

However, I'm not going to be able to stay away completely. I've decided to go wear a different lipstick every day until I have worn/photographed each one. I have so many, but I seem to carry the same three in my bag all the time. I plan to post the week in photos on Wednesdays from here on in. 

Products I tried in August: One Fell Swoop.

This is strictly meh. It doesn't really remove my very basic eye makeup very well, which was disappointing. I wear a thin strip of dark grey eyeliner, mascara that isn't waterproof, and an eyeshadow from the Naked Palette. None of these products have been especially difficult for other makeup removers to demolish, yet this one doesn't seem to budge it. I'm seriously thinking about slathering my face with this before I leave the house on rainy days, because this shit apparently makes my makeup impossible to budge.

Also, it smells like olive oil, but isn't especially moisturizing or nourishing. I don't recommend.

Nyx Eyeliner

I tried several different shades, and I really like them. I will be featuring them soon! 

The Urban Decay Naked Palette is the best eyeshadow purchase I have ever made. I'm a huge nude shadow addict, and this gives me a billion options in one easy-to-transport palette. My boyfriend and I are currently long distance, and I do a lot of overnight trips there and a few road trips with my friends. This allows me to travel light, but still do a few different looks. I love the brush that came with it, and the Primer Potion is amazing. I waited a long time to purchase this palette, and even though it was expensive, it was worth it. 

Rembrandt Intense Stain Whitening Toothpaste Review

I love this toothpaste! It is a bit more expensive, and a tube seems to last about two months. I have to say that it does noticeably lift stains, but isn't going to completely whiten them. I don't have horribly stained teeth, but I do love coffee, tea, and diet soda. I brush my teeth two or three times per day, depending on what I eat. 

This toothpaste is thinner than the usual Crest-type toothpaste — a little bit liquidy, but not too much. You want to be careful with your initial squeeze or your toothbrush is going to be overloaded with toothpaste. It has a rather boring mint flavor; nothing to write home about as far as that goes, and isn't gritty. I hate gritty toothpaste. 

My only real complaint is the price. Even though you can occasionally find coupons, it tends to be $2-3 more than your average tube of toothpaste.

Overall,  I recommend this toothpaste, even though it is somewhat pricy. 

Diorshow Mascara: A review.

This was a mascara that I really wanted to love, but ended up having a few issues with. It has such a cult following that I assumed that it was going to be amazing, and I was mistaken. 

First off, it does work fairly well. It isn't a terrible mascara, but it is nothing to write home about. I loved it initially, but have found myself falling out of love with it after using it for nearly a month. My main issue is the morning after: If I don't remove it completely before going to bed, it burns like crazy the next morning in the shower. 

I know that you may be thinking "how hard is it to wash your face at night?" It isn't that hard, but sometimes I get home really late and don't want to wake up my grandmum, and I end up using one of those facial cleansing towelette things. Not the best way to clean my face, but better than just going to bed with all of my makeup on. 

As I said, on the nights I don't remove everything completely, I get extreme irritation the next morning if I so much as touch my eyes. I don't mean "Oh, that is uncomfortable" I mean "Oh my god, this hurts so much!" with redness and visible irritation.

Also, there was something odd with the seal on my tube. For some reason I ended up with a bunch of build-up on the threading where the tube twisted shut. I don't know why, because I never have that problem with mascara and don't pump my brush in and out. I have grown annoyed with constantly wiping down the tube after re-sealing it because it sort of splooshes out the side. 

The mascara itself isn't anything to write home about. It works slightly better than my old Grow Luscious mascara, but only slightly and costs three times as much. 

Overall, I do not plan to buy it again. 

I'm actually planning to try Benefit "They're Real!" mascara next. 

Wet n Wild Megalast Nail Polish in Club Havana Swatch.

I actually love this Wet n Wild, but I didn't think that I would love this color. I bought it on a whim, and never applied it. I ended up wanting to do something different tonight, and put this on for kicks. I actually like it! I'm quite surprised.

*Today was my day off, and I baked a lemon pound cake. I got a little bit of flour on my leggings, but I thought that I had brushed it off sufficiently. However, the flash on my camera picked it up, and managed to make me look like a total slob. I'm not, but I have my "day off and sitting around the house" clothes that I love to wear when I'm not forced to look presentable. 

Neutrogena Naturals Fresh Cleansing + Makeup Remover Review

I used this nightly, as my pre-bed cleanser and used it as a makeup remover about half the time. It smells really good, not a typical "natural" scent, but nice and fresh. It removes makeup fairly well, but I still felt more comfortable using a makeup remover with it. I don't wear much makeup, but this seemed to have a bit of trouble removing my non-waterproof Diorshow mascara. 

This is not an amazing cleanser, but if I saw it on an good sale I might repurchase. It is just a basic cleanser with a nice scent. 

The Cartier Ring.

I love Cartier's Panthere line. There was one ring that I saw in a magazine a while back, and I was completely unable to find it on the website. It is truly my dream ring, and I hope to one day have one of my own. I really like the shape of the last one, but find it to be gaudy. If it were platinum instead with the emerald eyes and black nose, I might be more into it. The overabundance of jewels makes me cringe. I like the middle ring the most of all three as is, and the facial shape of the first. 

My name is Kat, and I want a cat ring. One of these would be my dream commitment ring. 

It isn't a conditioner, so it doesn't count.

It is an overnight treatment cream, and that is totally different than a conditioner. Technically, I have not broken my commitment to not purchasing more conditioners. 

I bought this during a moment of weakness, and then applied it that night. Both my boyfriend and I thought it looked awesome the next day. I have only used it once, and my hair has looked pretty good since then. Tonight is my second application, and it is part of the products I'm going to be reviewing in September, after I have used it a few more times. 

Yes, I am weak. And a promising hair product is always going to be tempting.

Thoughts.

I have been worrying about stupid crap lately. Money, mostly. Worrying about finding a job near my university this fall, being able to pay the rent on our apartment, etc. Wondering if everything is going to stay amazing with my boyfriend when I move in, and if his friends are going to like me, and if I should stick with my current majors or go to med school. 

And then today I saw that Steve Jobs resigned, and it looks like it is due to health problems. I realized that life is unpredictable. I mean, he has worked his ass off. He is brilliant, dedicated, and hard working. One of the wealthiest men in the States. And he has no way to control this, no way to stop this. 

It was sobering, and I guess I realized that, while I have to work towards my future, I have to let go a little bit. Money may be tight this fall, I might go hungry, and I may not have a fucking clue as to whether or not I will be an behavioral science/forensic anthropology major or a neurosurgeon. 

I'm not stupid enough to say I'm okay with it. I'm anxious, jittery, and running five directions at once. I won't be okay with this for a while. Eventually, I will be, and that is what I'm holding on to.