Monday, March 14, 2011
I had a feeling.
And it turned out to be a legitimate one. I went in, psych final was BAD and then I saw my old writing instructor. You know that feeling you have when you just know that no matter how much you like a person, you don't want to talk to them right now? Where you just want to go home/go to your room/be alone?
I had that feeling, and I was rushing to my car and tried to walk past him. I really, really did. It wasn't out of cruelty, I just didn't feel like chatting after the miserable final and I wanted to get home to finish off all the things that I have due tonight.
He flagged me down though, we made small talk, and I mentioned that my fallback if I don't get into any of the universities that I am applying to is the military. He was freaked out, and then mentioned my offensive humor and how it was a stretch to say I was funny and nice on my professor recommendation.
I admit, I kind of walked into it by saying "What is a limb or two?" in a sad, sarcastic way when he mentioned that women lose limbs in combat, and by saying that I probably wouldn't get to be in a real action-oriented area. Still, he was deeply shocked/offended and I was a bit surprised by that, and I feel bad.
Once again, I am not enough, and I feel crappy for it.