Tuesday, July 3, 2012


Life rarely works out in the way that one would hope. I used to believe that if you worked hard enough and put enough time in, your time and energy invested would be rewarded. 

I'm going into my third year of university, and I probably have another 6-10 years left (I want to be a surgeon.) I recently found out that, to pay for my education, my parents are expected to take out $12k worth of loans per year. This is figured into my financial aid, and therefore I'm $12k short for this year. 

This has been especially devastating, because I have truly excellent grades (one pesky B that I'm presently retaking) and have spent the last two years at a community college to take back-core classes for a lower price. I have worked incredibly hard to pay my dues, and now I have to look at selling my car.

It is incredibly frustrating, but it also shatters my worldview. I have worked since I was 14, and I have always hoped and planned for a future where life wasn't so hard. 

I'm a wee bit down, I have to say. My relationships and classes are going beautifully, and I'm being offered opportunities that I never could have imagined, and the only thing holding me back from these opportunities is the lack of funds. I know that it gets better, and that these problems are truly first-world problems. It is just incredibly difficult to keep picking yourself up time and time again. 

I know this is a bit more personal than what I typically post, but it is real. This is where I am, and I feel a lot of the time like I'm the only person who struggles like this, when in reality there are many people who do and just hide it. I don't want to contribute to anyone else's feeling of loneliness. 


  1. Thank you! I feel better now, I just had one day of awful doubt.


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